You should get up early. Stop sleeping late at night. When will you start exercising? Stop eating junk food. You should learn cooking. Do not speak loudly. It is an everyday occurrence. We get lots of advice from our parents, friends, colleagues, etc. But the advice from parents top everything else. You can’t ignore them and I think most of the time you succumb to them too. But this blog is not about that. It is for parents, sometimes maybe sometimes you should also heed to that advice. Lead by example. And after successfully conquering it, then, enrich your children all about your experience.
Doing it this way is much better than directly saying it out loud. It also helps when your child back talks saying- have you done this? And rather than you become speechless at their ‘audacity’ to talk back to you, you can shut them up pretty well by answering- yeah! I have done this. Let me tell you about my experience. You will love it.
See, problem solved.
But usually, this does not happen. What actually takes place is- you tell them to do something. They take offense, especially when you both do not share a strong bond and are misunderstood. That happens a lot. We do not sit and talk. But expect the other person to understand everything on their own in our terms. What happens next can be easily predicted. You shout, they shout and the resentment develops for God knows for how long.
No parent would want that to happen, right.
So why not try this way. Lead by example.
This is a great way to make them understand your point of view. But do not take this as I have done it you must do it too. No, that would be too tyrannical. Offering advice must remain that. An offering and not get converted into hell-bent-to-follow advice. That won’t do you any good. Your kid might rebel and you would be left thinking- what wrong did I do?
So rather than being abrupt about it, tell them gently. It should be like an insight on what you went through, like a guide book that will help your kid if he too embarks on that journey.
You want to tell your kid that you should start riding a bicycle, it will help you to build those leg muscles. Your kid might brush it off and won’t pay your advice any attention, while you, yourself are a lazy bum. Who does nothing, except complaining about how your legs hurt after you have climbed a few steps. So why not, when you suggest your kid to start bicycling you go ahead and join him. I am sure your kid will listen to you. In addition, it would definitely boost your relationship too.
Instead of saying, show them the way. Haven’t you heard the quote, ‘Actions speak louder than words.’ It holds true.
Ps- If you want to read more inspiring thoughts by great personalities do check out this link: https://rickconlow.com/12-eloquent-leading-by-example-quotes/